At Avengers headquarters, Tony Stark is busily creating gadgets for Spider-Man as a thank-you for his dedication to superheroism. Stark places the final touches and debates how to deliver the package. He could suit up and deliver it himself, convince Doctor Strange to teleport it, or use the boring, everyday mail system.
Stark runs all these scenarios through his head— Doctor Strange's focus has been a little divided lately, so he'll probably mess up the location and drop it on some poor lady’s head. As for himself, he has far too much on his plate to be bothered with personally delivering a package.
The mail system will have to suffice this time.
“JARVIS, create a shipping label for Spider-Man.”
“Sir, which Spider-Man would you like an address for?"
“I want Spider-Man’s address in this universe.”
“Sir, even if I narrow my search, there are still many addresses matching 'Spider-Man' —Tom Holland is Spider-Man in London, Nicolas Cage is Spider-Man in Las Vegas, Jack Quaid is Spider-Man in Los Angeles, Jharrle Jerome in New York City, Jake Joh…”,
JARVIS rattles on.
"Are all these people - Hailee Steinfield, Tom Holland, Shinji Todo, Nicholas Hammond, Tobey Maguire, Andrew Garfield, Nicolas Cage, etc. all Spider-Man?" thought Stark. "Perhaps each of them needs new gadgets if they're all Spider-Man."
“Wait, so you mean to tell me that in this reality we have what….5-10 Spider-Mans?”
“More like 30, sir.”
Curse that Doctor Strange for meddling with the multiverse!
“Okay, fine. Get me a list, and I’ll make gadgets for each of these Spider-Mans and send them out.”
“Yes, sir. Which addresses would you like me to use? It appears each of these people own multiple homes.”
Rubbing his face, Stark works to breathe evenly. How hard can it be to find a stupid address? Phone in hand, he Googles
“Tom Holland’s home address”
and selects the first search result.
“JARVIS, make a shipping label for Tom Holland at Kingston Thames London England UK.”
“Sir, that isn’t a valid or standardized address. I'm afraid the Royal Mail won't deliver it.”
“Then what is deliverable JARVIS?”
Stark is heavily debating disabling JARVIS for the foreseeable future.
“'Deliverable', sir, means there is a delivery point or a single place at which mail is delivered. Delivery points are possible when addresses are formatted properly with a premise number, thoroughfare, postal code, and country. Here is what Tom Holland's address should look like:"
Mr. Tom Holland
42-43 Kings Road Arches
BN1 2LN GBR
"See, each line represents a different data point. The premise number (42-43) identifies the package’s final destination, and the thoroughfare (King Road Arches) is the road or waterway through which a package must travel. The locality (Brighton) names the boundaries of the geographical area where the package will be delivered, and the postal code (BN1 2LN) pinpoints the street where the premise number lies. It’s important to be specific. Plus, Holland doesn’t live in or on the River Thames but in Brighton.”
Intrigued, Stark asks,
“Well, what about this Shinji Todo guy who lives in Japan? I don’t want an international incident because of a rogue package.”
“Well sir, international addresses can be tricky since each country and province can have different standardization requirements. Take Todo’s address in Japan. It begins with the postal code and follows with the administrative area, localities, premise number, and building name. The 3rd and 4th lines contain the country and addressee:"
大阪府 大阪市 北区 中之島 ４－２－５５ 北区
"Surely, sir, you can understand the different standards as the multiverse contains hundreds of unique standards.”
Stark did understand. How fascinating that valid and standard addresses are still a problem in today’s technologically advanced world.
To the uninformed, valid and invalid addresses are the same. But they are majorly different for those who work with addresses every day. Not unlike the time Hulk tried his monster hand at quantum physics, though he specializes in nuclear physics.
Stark’s mind wanders as JARVIS prints the labels— with so many Spider-Men existing just in his universe, how many more Spider-Men exist throughout the multiverse?
Where is your real home, Spider-Man?